Direct Sexual Game: My Two Cents

On one of the message boards I frequent a question of how to develop "Direct Sexual" game came up. Now personally I've been paring down elements of what I do in relation to girls, discarding what doesn't work and keeping what does. My $0.02 from that discussion board follows:

My current style is very playful indirect and I want to try out a very sexual direct style.

The Sexual BT seems lacking. We may makeout, but I don't often feel the "I want to take it back to your place" vibe.

What's your end goal for any given interaction? Is it the club makeout? Or is it to take a girl home? The two goals are mutually exclusive, IME.

Here's another angle to look at things: How slutty are you making the girl look in front of her friends? That's a more direct correlation to whether you'll be taking her home that night. If you're having sloppy makeout sessions in the middle of her group I can almost guarantee you won't be taking her home.

After an interaction and exchange of contact information, they come out for a Day 2 because I hype it up like crazy and they know they will have a good time with me. They come back to my place and sex happens with no LMR. If not on the Day 2, then usually by Day 3.

It feels like they say to themselves, "It just happened," instead of "I couldn't wait to fuck him."

I don't see where the problem lies here. You should be removing all responsibility for the sex from their shoulders anyways. "Plausible deniability" and all that, at least on the surface. It's easier for girls to explain to their girlfriends that "it just happened," so just run with it.

Girls know EXACTLY what they're doing when they enter your house, when they ALLOW you to use their bathroom "real quick", when they join you "just for a quick drink." They're not stupid, BUT they DO need to still "save face" to prevent being branded with the Scarlet Letter.

If you have found experiences or successes with a Sexual Direct style, would you give me some pointers?

Anything from openers, lines/routines, body language, tonality, things to do on Day 2's, conversation styles, mindset, and/or anything else you feel is relevant is appreciated. I'm open to everything and am all ears.

IMO, "Sexual Direct" is where everyone's game should be evolving towards. There are no "openers" or routines, you simply "Are."

The ingredients, IME:

1. ROCK-SOLID Inner Game
2. Outcome Independence (which is tied in to Inner Game)
3. SOLID Body Language (which includes Eye Contact and vocal tonality)
4. Smooth, ninja-like kinoescalation
5. Social savvy

IME you reach this state through experience, it's not something that's taught, per se. Some notes, in no particular order:

-It's a very efficient mode to operate from. You're not necessarily looking for anything on a given night, but if opportunities present themselves you act on them. Otherwise you're out having fun on your terms.

-When you get enough "IOIs," aka she's invested in your interaction, you kinoescalate smoothly. Now by smoothly I mean you do it out of the line-of-sight of her social circle, and you do it assertively but NOT aggressively. There's also an element of 2 steps forward/1 step back and pull/push. Everything is geared towards making her feel comfortable with you and PROTECTING HER FROM THE JUDGMENT OF HER FRIENDS.

-You figure out VERY QUICKLY if a girl is into you. I do this by testing her hands. THE HANDS NEVER LIE. EVER. If she's not in to me I just cut the interaction and move on. Saves me precious minutes of my life.

-If she's playing with my hands, IT'S ON. All I do from there is "lean back" psychologically and act like she's my girlfriend. As long as I remain outcome independent, "be cool" and lead the interaction then sex is a foregone conclusion in my mind, so I have nothing to stress about.

-My "game" nowadays is geared heavily towards Kino and Body Language. My Attraction stuff is just me being my charming, witty Self (banter, roleplay, misinterpretation, just "being fun"). I don't "try". My Rapport is super-duper dry and "deep" enough to ground me as a real person; it's the most boring shit you'll ever hear.

-An important note: My kino often runs counter to what I say, in a way (that good 'ol "pull/push" element again). For example I might tell a girl we'd TOTALLY not get along, but give her a warm hug at the same time (push her away with words, pull her in with kino). Another example might be my dry-ass Rapport, which I couple with more sensual kino (logical info vs. emotional connection, in a way).

A girl can have a flag over her head saying, "Lets bone tonight," and I wouldn't know. I'm sometimes oblivious to it. My first SNL happened when the girl said, "I live down the street. Come over. We'll grab a drink." As obvious as it sounds to you, I didn't realize we were going to go at it until she said, "Lets go to bed and pulled me by the hand into her room."

Don't worry you're not alone in your obliviousness. There are times even now when I don't "get it" in the moment, but upon reflection I *TOTALLY* missed the "go" signal.

I think this is where learning more about inference and wordplay helps. I'd like to think I'm somewhat well-read and have a good grasp of dry wit, double entendres and the like. It translates well to understanding how girls try to communicate, because the real message lies below the surface of the words she presents, usually.

Is there any compliance type testing you do with her? (Like that random routine, "Let me see your hands. Palms down." You lift up with her and on the way down, if she follows your hands, she's compliant. If not, she isn't.)

Or is it more of subtly playing with her hands and having her play back while you are interacting?

I used to do contrived hand tests like high-fives and palm reading. They served their purpose back then but now when I look back they're a bit... awkward.

I just gently grab her hand while talking about whatever. This is usually a couple of minutes into the interaction and I have an inkling that she might be into me. It's quick and off to the side of our bodies. I just grab and see what she does. If she leaves her hand there for a bit I'll squeeze it lightly to see what she does. Whatever reaction I get I let go and either escalate the interaction or end it.

XXXXX and XXXXX have seen me do it in-field, it doesn't look like anything special but it's a treasure-trove of information for me.

I don't make a big deal about it because it isn't a big deal. It's just communication on a more primal level.

What kinds of roleplay do you run with her? Is it subtly sexual like, "I'm prince charming and you're the naughty little princess," or blatantly sexual like, "I am the dungeon master and you're my obedient dungeoness in training." (I just made those up)

To be honest I don't roleplay THAT much because I suck at it. :-\ However I make up for this deficiency with my uber-1337 banter steez. B-)

Sometimes the situations to roleplay will make themselves apparent and I'll run with it but I don't force it, personally.

Would you clarify what you mean by "Dry-ass Rapport" and "logical info vs. emotional connection?"

Dry-ass Rapport
Well, you know how EVERY major PUA out there says to NOT ask The Boring Questions (aka, "Where are you from", "What do you do", "What are your hobbies")? I fly in the face of convention and ask that shit in Rapport. It's "not supposed to work" but I make that shit work because my kino is the real conversation, anyways; my words just ground me as a real person instead of as a Player. That way when she talks to her girlfriends later she can say, "Oh, he's a good guy. He does XYZ in Los Angeles. He used to live in ABC. His parents are here, blah blah."

logical info vs. emotional connection
That ties into the above, and really is about the concept of Contrast. I forget who taught me this but being able to convey contrasting (not conflicting, subtle distinction) information simultaneously is good. I extend this idea into my communication of logical information (Who I am, what I do) with emotional connection (playing with her hands, sensual kino on her back, kissing, etc).

It's a deeper topic that wiser minds than I can explain in greater detail.

For the direct sexual style, is it still best to set the venue bounce as, "Come over to check out some pictures at my place," or if I say, "You're coming over tonight. Lets go," - is that as, or more, effective?

You mean directly from the club to your pad? That can work. Personally I like to take them to get some food first. It's good for a number of reasons, IMO:

-EAT FOOD (duh!)
-Venue change
-Safe environment for them that isn't "the club" to be social in
-Become integrated with her group ("We" went out for food after the club)
-Quieter, "normal" environment to get more Rapport and kinoescalation in (under the table stuff, so hot)
-In my mind it's more reasonable to bounce a girl from a restaurant. Why? I dunno.

Velvet Room

Time/Date
Saturday, 05/03/08, 10:30pm - 2:00am

Location
Velvet Room, K-Town

Logistics
Rolling with some new Korean friends

The shizzle that went bizzle
Asian girls, by and large, are socially inept. God bless 'em and all that, but man, I've had better connections with a wall than I've gotten with the girls tonight...

I was invited out by some new Korean friends I made to a booking club here in Koreatown called Velvet Room. Now, for those of you that aren't familiar with booking clubs, this is how they work:

In Korean culture it's more "proper" to be introduced by a stranger to someone else than to cold approach and booking clubs exemplify this to a horrific degree. The idea is that you rent a table or booth for the evening and your waiter can "book" girls to come to your table, drink your alcohol, eat your decorate fruit platter, and/or talk with you. Now, by "book" I mean forcibly drag girls that aren't necessarily willing to your table of dudes. The waiters earn tips for the girls that they book for you-- more traffic = more money for him/her.

TOTALLY not my style. :-\

Now this particular booking club was actually pretty fly-- the interior is large and it's FULL of tables and booths. There's a large dance floor in the middle, private rooms in the back, and a smoking patio on the side.

The environment is LOUD. Imagine the loudest club you've ever been to, then pump it up another 15% in decibel-levels. As you can imagine this makes any verbal game a near impossibility, never mind the potential language barriers.

The girls are HOT. I know many of you may think that Asian girls have no ass and no boobs, but one look at the talent here and it'd prove you wrong VERY quickly. All the girls are dressed to the 9's and tend to travel in packs for safety.

Now, in terms of my results, here's how it went down for me:

0 for 25 for the evening, with only ONE girl even potentially hooking (but it was at the end of the night and she was there with some dudes and her girl friends waiting for their cars).

Did I mention that Asian girls are socially inept? :-\

Direct Game didn't pan out for me because of the environment-- all the waiters manhandle the girls there, so things like opening with kino or going Direct are an uphill battle because the girls will just lump you into the "drunk asshole" category fairly quickly.

Situational stuff didn't pan out either-- even in the smoking patio where I could actually talk only two girls were receptive and those shut down with the quickness once their friends got involved. Every other set was cooooold. Frigid. Even when I came in friendly, I got shut down faster than a... a... I don't even have a word for it. Frustration City.

The only avenue that I think can bear any fruit in this environment--

Dance Floor Game.

The girls seemed more receptive on the dance floor when I went to shake my groove thing but I had to tend to my friends more often than not which dragged me off the floor. I'm willing to explore this angle more for this environment since all my other usual tactics bore no fruit.

If you want to meet Asian girls at night, I DO NOT recommend this type of venue. Everything is working against you. The only reason I'd go back is to explore Dance Floor Game and see what that bears.

What I did good
I walked out of dead/dying sets very quickly. When girls copped attitude I just shut down the interaction and went on to the next group. I stretched my dancing muscles a bit and learned a little more about just not giving a fuck on the dance floor.

I made some new connections with Korean guys that are familiar with K-Town. We'll see how those pan out.

What I could've done better
Danced more?

Extra comments
I gotta say I'm a little bit more disillusioned about Asian girls now after this night. A SHIT-TON of work for little return in this environment and just in general. I personally don't have the time nor inclination to work the social circle angle.

Time to start checking out more racially-diverse environments.