Soul Gazing in the Rite Aid

Eye Contact. It's one of those things where, if you know what the fuck you're doing, it trumps pretty much anything you can use to communicate with a girl. Girls love a man that can give strong eye contact (no, not crazy stalker eyes, I mean the kind of gaze that looks right into her soul), and not enough men out there can look even other men right in the eye let alone a cute girl.

I was running into the local Rite Aid last night, looking to pick up a pack of smokes (PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE: Don't smoke, it's bad for you.) when a girl that was working the front door (selling some sort of offer dealing with prescriptions or something) greeted me with a simple, "Hello." I turned and looked at her and, lo and behold, she's pretty cute. I don't normally go for black chicks but there was something about her that intrigued me, so I flashed a smile at her and continued talking with her. Throw in some banter here and there and we're off to the races.

Now the one thing which I learned from the last Art of Rapport Workshop that I helped instruct at was this exercise that is similar to David Deida's "Soul Gazing" exercise. As a result of that exercise I'm a LOT more conscious of my use of eye contact and it's actually a primary method of communication I use now on top of kino and proper body language. I could be talking about shopping for groceries with a girl now but if I've got her gaze just right I can intensify our connection without even kino'ing her.

Long story short with the Rite-Aid chick: our whole interaction had extended periods of "soul gazing" while talking about whatever and I could feel how "hot" this interaction was right in my chest. It's the kind of fuzzy feeling I get while sexing chicks and I'm pretty sure she was feeling it, too, just by looking in her eyes and at her body language. She was a pretty guarded individual, though, so securing a day2 was difficult. I invited her to meet me for coffee near my workplace at 5:00pm this afternoon; if she shows up, great, if not, well I'll be out there enjoying a coffee and some 90-degree sunshine (and maybe the company of another cute chick that may be seated outside? Who knows.).

So a bunch of PUAs walk into the Roosevelt Hotel...

This weekend was interesting. A buddy of mine was kind enough to give me a ticket to this PUA Summit that was happening at the Roosevelt Hotel. I didn't have anything better to do this weekend so I decided to attend, if anything to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen in a while.

The Summit itself was kind of cool. To be honest it felt like a giant sales pitch of all these different workshops but since I'm an instructor with PU101 I don't have a strong need for extra coaching (I can look within PU101 for that, if need be). That's not to say I didn't learn a thing or two while there. I learned some tips from the speaker representing Vin DiCarlo about their ideas on kinoescalation which I'll be sure to be implementing in my own style.

Daniel flew down to represent PU101 (along with his lovely cohort, A.) so I got to catch up with him for a few minutes during some of the breaks, and Jeff was there to lend Daniel some support with the products on display. Dan's gotten really good with public speaking and I'm excited to see how he does with bigger crowds in the future.

While hanging around the Roosevelt during the breaks several opportunities to talk to cute girls arose but I didn't pursue. :-( I'm not sure if it was good 'ol fashioned AA or approaching in front of a bunch of PUAs or what but I'm still kicking myself right now for not taking action. They were actually "my type" as well, which makes me doubly critical of my inaction. Hopefully these serve as fuel to propel me towards the next cute girl I see that flips my switches.

There was one saving grace from the weekend, though, in terms of socializing. Sunday night, while taking a smoke break at Geisha House I randomly started chatting up this couple in Geisha House's smoking patio. We actually had a really cool conversation where I got to refine my Rapport skills on a mixed set as well as refine my knowledge of astrology. At first the girl was very cold but I cracked her when I pegged her star sign on the first shot (Sagittarius) and got the guy's sign as well (Aquarius). I'm not really compatible with either of those signs (I'm a Virgo, but definitely not a virgin) but that doesn't stop me from getting to know them as people and sharing stuff about myself as well. Anytime I can end an evening with an enlightening conversation with cool people that's a win in my book (every night doesn't have to end in the bedroom with some random chick ;-) ).

...oh, and if you were curious, here's some bullet points on those star signs which are dead giveaways:

Aquarius: loves to travel A LOT; very spiritual (but not necessarily religious); tends to be more social than most; may have artistic tendencies

Sagittarius: Blunt, logical speech patterns; many creative tendencies (art, music, writing); talkative; slightly domineering (like in convos and whatnot)

Virgo: well, that's for YOU to research. I'm not gonna tell you EVERYTHING! ;-)

Frickin' Asian girls, man...

OK, just have to rant a bit here as this is still frustrating to me:

Why are Asian girls so difficult? I mean, seriously, c'mon. I don't know if it's only my experience with the non-American Asian girls I run across but every single time I talk to one Direct (usually, "You're cute. What's your name?") they shut down. Completely. I can read it in their face and I know the interaction is done before they even say anything.

Case in point: Was eating lunch at Lucy's Lunch Box here in Santa Monica, chilling outside with some co-workers when this cute-as-a-button Korean girl walks by. Instant gut reaction on my part, I know I have to talk to her. I wait a second, go back inside and open her Direct. Her face registers something along the lines of disbelief or something (I can't quantify it really, but it's not a good thing) and the interaction pretty much dies after that.

The frustrating part is that I'm pretty sure it's not me, since I get generally positive results with American-born Asian girls (as well as other ethnicities) when I go Direct on them. I'm wondering if something about my Body Language changes or my energy. I think I need to bring in a professional eye to check what's happening with my body language communications with non-American Asian girls because this is becoming frustrating really quickly.

The interim solution, for me, is to keep things Indirect with any Asian chick I run across. I don't like doing that all the time, though, since there are some chicks where it just feels right to go Direct.

If only I didn't find Asian girls so Attractive this would make my life TONS easier. :-\

You know what's awesome?

Total aside here: Making girls squirt is fast becoming a new hobby of mine. When I do end up have sexytimes with a particular girl it's become my mission to (1) make sure she cums multiple times and (2) see if I can make her squirt. Being squirt upon is a peculiar sensation that I'm still getting used to, but it's still totally awesome especially when you can do it without using your hands or mouth (if you catch my drift).

Granted, not all girls can squirt. Most can, though, if you turn them on in juuuuust the right way. I was recently with a girl who, on the outside seems prim and proper but, after getting her in the mood, I got to work and threw in some dirty talk. Viola, we are no longer dry!

The key, IME, is to be totally 100% present with her and to make her feel sexy and accepted. It also helps to tap into some archetypes that many women carry with them as well as some darker fantasies a lot of women have in their minds. I won't go into detail about them (since YMMV with any given woman) but a great resource for learning more is the book My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday. It'll blow your mind how freaky women can be in a safe fantasy environment.

Ahhhhh women. Good times, good times... :-)

Where the fuck have I been?

It's been a while since I've posted here. Work's been kicking my ass the whole month of July and parts of August which has severely limited my daytime excursions. Obviously I'm not exactly the happiest camper right now, but I try to find time to socialize when I can, which has mostly been at night.

Most recently I've been hanging with a good friend of mine, Ulysses. He's a cool cat with a real rocker vibe to him. Mostly been rolling with him to Bar Lubitsch up on Santa Monica Blvd (near Fairfax) which is a cool lil' vodka bar. Depending on what night I've gone there's been a lot of entertainment industry people milling about, which includes the occasional actress. Not bad, although I hadn't been pushing myself lately. I'm mildly concerned about that, since I know I can do way better than I have been.

I taught at another of PU101's Art of Attraction workshops here in Los Angeles. The key difference? I got paid this time, sucka, g'yeah! Granted it's not a lot of money but it's something to make up for some of the lost sleep and lost weekend. Beyond that fact, though, is the teaching I got to do, which I really enjoy. I can't really accurately explain the satisfaction that I get from seeing my students succeed; I guess the closest analogy I can make is that it's similar to seeing your child grow up or something. It's a great feeling.

One of the side benefits of teaching is refinement of my own game and being able to tackle my Sticking Points. One of my major hurdles has been really owning my sexuality and feeling comfortable expressing it with women. While teaching in the field (which included taking students to places like Saddle Ranch and Beauty Bar) I was able to make significant progress with this SP: my kino flowed very smoothly and escalated a lot quicker. I was also able to observe Hristiyan (the Head Instructor for the weekend) who has a very sexually-charged style of kino. He was super-smooth, it was awesome watching him go to work.

And on a totally unrelated-to-anything note, I saw Kat Von D at Beauty Bar on Saturday night. She's taller than she looks on TV, but is just as cute in-person.