Yay B-List celebrities

Who would've thought that Santa Monica attracted the PUA type?

I was hanging with some friends from the Santa Monica Lounge at World Cafe tonight, just shooting the shit and seeing what the night brought. It was sort-of crowded at World Cafe, but not in a good way-- mostly white people with a smattering of Asians and Indians to color up the crowd a bit. I was mainly interested in talking with my friends and hanging out; I'm pretty lazy when it comes to opening groups of people as of late as I'm trying to just let the universe bring me the people that I'm meant to interact with.

While sitting around shooting the shit one of my friends recognized J-Dog from "The Pickup Artist" on VH1 with some girl. I turn around and introduce myself to J and to the girl, T. who happens to be the producer for the aforementioned show. I end up shooting the shit with the both of them and they're both really cool cats. It's a shame that J doesn't get even coverage on the show since my perception of him from the show is not as good as my perception of him after I met him. I eventually also talk to Spoon for a hot minute who seems to be in a better headspace than he was during the TV show.

I think it's fascinating how being a "B-List" celebrity can be either a major boon or a major bust for a person's social value. On the positive side you get recognized by some people which kind of puts you on a slightly elevated status relative to other people in the room. On the flip side, though, it makes it hard to discern whether a person is into you for who you REALLY are or if they're just enamored by who they perceive you to be from whatever it is you're famous for. I'm not sure I would ever be ready for the lifestyle of a celebrity, even a minor celebrity from a show like "The Pickup Artist." By nature I'm a very private person so I think all the poking and prodding by random people into my business would grate me after a while. I suppose it's a good thing I'm not a world-famous pickup artist then. ;-)

An evening at S Bar and The Griffin

Logistics, logistics, logistics. Things like "getting IOIs" or "DHV'ing" or whatever bullshit are not my Sticking Point right now, everything keeps boiling down to the big "L" word. I'm very finely tuned into social interactions nowadays and I'm closer to running "Natural" game than I was 3 months ago. I have maybe 1 or 2 fun roleplaying openers that I keep in my back pocket but other than that I let my Body Language and Kino do the lion's share of the work for me. Now I just have to start finding girls that are local and down for some same-night sexytimes and I'll be golden.

Tonight was something of an interesting learning experience, albiet a touch frustrating. I'm trying to explore K-Town more (because of my irrational love of Korean women) and went to S Bar on Wilshire Blvd and New Hampshire Ave with my buddies Ulysses and S. If you've never been to this kind of bar before it's something akin to a hostess bar where the bartenders (who are all Asian women) pour your drinks, drink some of your alcohol, eat some of your food and generally entertain you. Tonight (Saturday) was actually kind of dead-- the only cute girls were behind the bar and that was a logistical challenge for me. I can't really kino across the bar easily so it makes getting the girls warmed up difficult. I need to find a spot at the bar where it opens up or something so I can stand next to them and get them hot and bothered to bounce later in the evening. I really dig a couple of the bartenders there and would ravish them in a New York Minute but I still haven't been able to crack the code yet, as it were. This'll be a pet project of mine for a while.

We eventually bounce from there to a new bar up in the Atwater Village area called The Griffin, which is something of a greaser rockabilly spot with a really chill vibe. We're chillin' in the smoking area and at one point I'm like, "Fuck this, I'm going to do the whole social butterfly thing" and bounce my way through the smoking area. Most of the sets end up dying for one reason or another until the very last set at the end of the evening (and at the end of the smoking patio, coincidentally).

I open the set with my tried-and-true, "Hey, do you have a light?" and I get the ball rolling. I eventually just start shooting the shit with all of them and try to get myself integrated with the group. Eventually 3 more of their friends show up, one of which is this STUNNING Vietnamese chick named V.T. Wow. We introduce ourselves to each other and I'm getting the vibe from her. I end up chatting up everyone else for a bit and eventually get drawn into a conversation with her sitting at the table.

From the moment we started talking I knew it was on. I was ramping the kino on her leg, under the table, while sitting in this dark spot of the bar. I was looking at her with strong Eye Contact ("Soul Gazing:" left eye to left eye) and going into some Medium Rapport stuff. I would've taken things further (feeling up her hands, her inner thigh, putting her hands in my lap, etc) but then I get cockblocked by her two friends that pull her into a conversation at the OTHER table. Blah. I go back to vibing with some of the guys at the table I was at for a bit.

Now at this point I have a decision to make: go for the day2 or the ONS. Given the logistics of her friends being there and whatnot I went for the day2. I stood up, went over to her table and chatted up her friend for a second before turning my attention to V.T. I straight up tell her, "Hey, I know you're with friends right now but I really would like to get to know you better since you seem like a cool chick. Let's get a coffee next week." From here logistics spanks me again:

-She lives in Huntington Beach, but is going to school at UC Santa Cruz (going back in 1 month)
-She has a live-in boyfriend
-She's working part-time at Fashion Island in Newport Beach (which is FAAAAAAAR from both my work and apartment)

I press for a meet-up (while kino'ing her back and arms away from prying eyes) and she seems to be giving it serious thought (eye-accessing cues down and to the left) but starts hemming and hawing about the points above. At that point it's do-or-die, since pressing for the ONS is more than a little difficult with all her friends there. I tell her this is her last chance since I was leaving (which is true), and she seems to consider it deeply one last time but ultimately backs out. Blah again. I say bye to everyone in the group and exit with grace.

3 feet from gold, man. 3 feet...

So, what did I learn tonight?

-Reinforced the fact that I'm a sexy bitch and chicks want to fuck me. w00t!
-Kinoescalate like there's no tomorrow but do it discreetly (i.e., under the table in a dark spot of the bar).
-"Soul Gazing" is the shit. I do this with everyone now but most especially with chicks. You can have the most DRY conversation in the world but you can basically eye-fuck each other in the middle of her friends. It's hot.
-Don't ignore her friends, integrate yourself with the group.

Ahh well, chalk this night up to experience.

Happy Birthday to me...

Today was the celebration of my birth upon this Earth and I'm dead-ass tired right now. I had spent this Labor Day weekend in the City of Sin: Lost Wages, NV. I went with 3 of the closest people I have in my life: my brother, my cousin, and my good friend K. My goals that weekend were simple: play craps, pick up girls (if the situation presented itself), shoot guns and (if the mood struck) see some titties.

I gotta say this weekend was a mixed bag.

The craps tables at Excalibur and Hard Rock took me for about $1,500 (I had some good runs as the shooter, I shoulda left when I was up) so that kind of messed with my head a bit. I earmarked $1,500 for this weekend so it's not like I wasn't mentally prepared for it, just the fact that I couldn't catch ANY breaks at the Hard Rock craps tables really set me back emotionally-- I didn't have the desire to flirt with girls after losing money the way I did.

******

In terms of flirting with girls things just weren't hitting. Most of the girls were either with BFs, were boring, or were too "hot" for my emotional state at that moment. The girls that DID have potential I messed up by mistiming my approach. For example I was in Mist at Treasure Island, the freebie bar near the front entrance. It was more or less a cockfarm (blah), but there were several sets that could have gone better if I timed things differently:

1) Mixed set of guys and girls sort of dancing near the front. Asians. I got solid EC from one of the girls but hesitated too long to open them. I had to wait until the one I wanted sat down at her table alone and I went Direct. Slight language barrier and eventually her BF returned and basically shut me out. I greeted him in a friendly manner and exited with grace.

2) 2 girls walked into the bar, one Asian the other White. While they were at the bar waiting to get the attention of the bartender I opened them with the roleplay frame that I was part of their group and was running late. I had them laughing and engaged for the first minute, but I eventually lost them to the bartender. Had I waited for them to get their drinks things would probably have gone better.

******

I've come to a couple of realizations from this weekend in terms of what I want out of this whole "meet girls" thing:

-Although I can function in a high-energy environment I much rather prefer quieter, "normal" locales to work my magic. For example I was leaving the Sherwood Forest Cafe in Excalibur when I saw this cute Asian chick eating by herself. I passed by her table, thought about it, then went back. I opened her sincerely but relaxed with, "Hey, you're really cute. I want to get to know you," and caught her off-guard a bit while she was eating her soup. It was cute. We vibed for a bit but she was there with her BF (who was playing poker at the time) so I took the convo as far as I could to practice my Rapport skills. After a few I left her to her meal and rejoined my buds.

-I can't force myself or put undue pressure on myself to open because that's when I fvck things up. When I'm relaxed and having fun with my friends and cute girls happen by things tend to fall into place. I already logged my training hours behind the wheel, I just have to let shit happen now.

-I don't really want a one-night stand. That may sound weird to some but in my heart of hearts those kinds of encounters don't really do it for me. I want a connection with the girl, that just makes the sexytimes all the more sweeter. That's not to say that I can't develop a deep connection with girls in one night, so I don't preclude the possibility of having an ONS, but most (if not all) of my night-time connections as of late have been shallow to medium Rapport, at best.

******

On the upside I had TONS of fun hanging with my boys, shooting the shit, just being Men without apologies. Shooting guns at The Gun Store kicked ass, as usual. And to round things out we went to Sin (a strip club) and saw some titties, which is always good times (hey, I'm still a guy, y'know).

Soul Gazing in the Rite Aid

Eye Contact. It's one of those things where, if you know what the fuck you're doing, it trumps pretty much anything you can use to communicate with a girl. Girls love a man that can give strong eye contact (no, not crazy stalker eyes, I mean the kind of gaze that looks right into her soul), and not enough men out there can look even other men right in the eye let alone a cute girl.

I was running into the local Rite Aid last night, looking to pick up a pack of smokes (PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE: Don't smoke, it's bad for you.) when a girl that was working the front door (selling some sort of offer dealing with prescriptions or something) greeted me with a simple, "Hello." I turned and looked at her and, lo and behold, she's pretty cute. I don't normally go for black chicks but there was something about her that intrigued me, so I flashed a smile at her and continued talking with her. Throw in some banter here and there and we're off to the races.

Now the one thing which I learned from the last Art of Rapport Workshop that I helped instruct at was this exercise that is similar to David Deida's "Soul Gazing" exercise. As a result of that exercise I'm a LOT more conscious of my use of eye contact and it's actually a primary method of communication I use now on top of kino and proper body language. I could be talking about shopping for groceries with a girl now but if I've got her gaze just right I can intensify our connection without even kino'ing her.

Long story short with the Rite-Aid chick: our whole interaction had extended periods of "soul gazing" while talking about whatever and I could feel how "hot" this interaction was right in my chest. It's the kind of fuzzy feeling I get while sexing chicks and I'm pretty sure she was feeling it, too, just by looking in her eyes and at her body language. She was a pretty guarded individual, though, so securing a day2 was difficult. I invited her to meet me for coffee near my workplace at 5:00pm this afternoon; if she shows up, great, if not, well I'll be out there enjoying a coffee and some 90-degree sunshine (and maybe the company of another cute chick that may be seated outside? Who knows.).

So a bunch of PUAs walk into the Roosevelt Hotel...

This weekend was interesting. A buddy of mine was kind enough to give me a ticket to this PUA Summit that was happening at the Roosevelt Hotel. I didn't have anything better to do this weekend so I decided to attend, if anything to catch up with some friends I hadn't seen in a while.

The Summit itself was kind of cool. To be honest it felt like a giant sales pitch of all these different workshops but since I'm an instructor with PU101 I don't have a strong need for extra coaching (I can look within PU101 for that, if need be). That's not to say I didn't learn a thing or two while there. I learned some tips from the speaker representing Vin DiCarlo about their ideas on kinoescalation which I'll be sure to be implementing in my own style.

Daniel flew down to represent PU101 (along with his lovely cohort, A.) so I got to catch up with him for a few minutes during some of the breaks, and Jeff was there to lend Daniel some support with the products on display. Dan's gotten really good with public speaking and I'm excited to see how he does with bigger crowds in the future.

While hanging around the Roosevelt during the breaks several opportunities to talk to cute girls arose but I didn't pursue. :-( I'm not sure if it was good 'ol fashioned AA or approaching in front of a bunch of PUAs or what but I'm still kicking myself right now for not taking action. They were actually "my type" as well, which makes me doubly critical of my inaction. Hopefully these serve as fuel to propel me towards the next cute girl I see that flips my switches.

There was one saving grace from the weekend, though, in terms of socializing. Sunday night, while taking a smoke break at Geisha House I randomly started chatting up this couple in Geisha House's smoking patio. We actually had a really cool conversation where I got to refine my Rapport skills on a mixed set as well as refine my knowledge of astrology. At first the girl was very cold but I cracked her when I pegged her star sign on the first shot (Sagittarius) and got the guy's sign as well (Aquarius). I'm not really compatible with either of those signs (I'm a Virgo, but definitely not a virgin) but that doesn't stop me from getting to know them as people and sharing stuff about myself as well. Anytime I can end an evening with an enlightening conversation with cool people that's a win in my book (every night doesn't have to end in the bedroom with some random chick ;-) ).

...oh, and if you were curious, here's some bullet points on those star signs which are dead giveaways:

Aquarius: loves to travel A LOT; very spiritual (but not necessarily religious); tends to be more social than most; may have artistic tendencies

Sagittarius: Blunt, logical speech patterns; many creative tendencies (art, music, writing); talkative; slightly domineering (like in convos and whatnot)

Virgo: well, that's for YOU to research. I'm not gonna tell you EVERYTHING! ;-)

Frickin' Asian girls, man...

OK, just have to rant a bit here as this is still frustrating to me:

Why are Asian girls so difficult? I mean, seriously, c'mon. I don't know if it's only my experience with the non-American Asian girls I run across but every single time I talk to one Direct (usually, "You're cute. What's your name?") they shut down. Completely. I can read it in their face and I know the interaction is done before they even say anything.

Case in point: Was eating lunch at Lucy's Lunch Box here in Santa Monica, chilling outside with some co-workers when this cute-as-a-button Korean girl walks by. Instant gut reaction on my part, I know I have to talk to her. I wait a second, go back inside and open her Direct. Her face registers something along the lines of disbelief or something (I can't quantify it really, but it's not a good thing) and the interaction pretty much dies after that.

The frustrating part is that I'm pretty sure it's not me, since I get generally positive results with American-born Asian girls (as well as other ethnicities) when I go Direct on them. I'm wondering if something about my Body Language changes or my energy. I think I need to bring in a professional eye to check what's happening with my body language communications with non-American Asian girls because this is becoming frustrating really quickly.

The interim solution, for me, is to keep things Indirect with any Asian chick I run across. I don't like doing that all the time, though, since there are some chicks where it just feels right to go Direct.

If only I didn't find Asian girls so Attractive this would make my life TONS easier. :-\

You know what's awesome?

Total aside here: Making girls squirt is fast becoming a new hobby of mine. When I do end up have sexytimes with a particular girl it's become my mission to (1) make sure she cums multiple times and (2) see if I can make her squirt. Being squirt upon is a peculiar sensation that I'm still getting used to, but it's still totally awesome especially when you can do it without using your hands or mouth (if you catch my drift).

Granted, not all girls can squirt. Most can, though, if you turn them on in juuuuust the right way. I was recently with a girl who, on the outside seems prim and proper but, after getting her in the mood, I got to work and threw in some dirty talk. Viola, we are no longer dry!

The key, IME, is to be totally 100% present with her and to make her feel sexy and accepted. It also helps to tap into some archetypes that many women carry with them as well as some darker fantasies a lot of women have in their minds. I won't go into detail about them (since YMMV with any given woman) but a great resource for learning more is the book My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday. It'll blow your mind how freaky women can be in a safe fantasy environment.

Ahhhhh women. Good times, good times... :-)